This time of year always stirs so many emotions for me.

I look back on the year and reflect on how I could’ve done better. What I could’ve done more off. Differently.

Nothing to do with sales, business goals or dream clients. And everything to do with family.

Questions to ask yourself as the year draws to a close:
  1. Did I make time to truly listen to their stories?
  2. Did I look them in the eyes when they spoke to me?
  3. Did I tell them how much I appreciate their kind gestures and generosity?
  4. Did I accept their help when they offered?
  5. Was I truly present in the moments we shared?
  6. Did I make time to simply be with them?

So yes — always looking to do better at these things.

Time and presence are our gifts to give. And they are priceless when received, any time of year.

 

 

 

Can I share a story with you?

So, I remember this one afternoon I sat with my Grandfather at my Aunty’s kitchen table with the retro yellow vinyl swivel chairs she’s had since forever. I had picked up his favourite pineapple buns from the Chinese bakery for the occasion.

That day, I “interviewed” my Grandfather about his childhood, how he met my Grandmother, their wedding day, the bookstore where he worked as a young man, and how he came to live in Australia. I wrote everything down, not wanting to miss any details.

I hope he knew his life did not go unnoticed. That his life mattered.

For this reason, I document memories and milestones for my boys. I want them to know the seemingly ordinary things they say and do, the things they think and care about, their kindness and thoughtful gestures do not go unnoticed. That I have noticed, seen and heard them.

This quote speaks about one of our deepest innate human needs. And that’s to know our story has been heard. Our feelings acknowledged. Our joys celebrated. And our hardships and humanness witnessed.

Do you remember a time you felt truly noticed, seen and heard?

 

 

 

“Aw..came home after drop off to find Teddy in our bed. My littlest man must have left him here after climbing in for cuddles this morning.

Remembering firsts is easy. Soak up all the subsequents so that when the last comes along, you can look back content that you’ve enjoyed every moment.” (originally posted 17 June, 2016)

I still live by savouring everyday moments.

The past few weeks have been full of those heart tugging mama feelings. With senior subject selections for my eldest. And my youngest growing taller overnight. The speed at which the years roll by hits me hard, time and time again.

There’s so many little things I notice I miss. In the moments they happened, I know I savoured them. But I still miss them.

The childhood innocence fades. I remember my littlest man pulling back his covers after we’d tucked him into bed, and with the sweetest smile, he’d ask me to lie with him. He’d snuggle up close to fall asleep. I miss that.

He used to love me SO much — and tell me a million times a day. “I love you so so soooo much Mama”. I know he still does…but I feel it changing. As I type this, my eyes are welling with tears.

Motherhood is deeply bitter sweet.

I am so proud of the incredible humans they are becoming. But I miss their littleness, and my heart actually hurts a bit.

Mamas, can you relate?

 

 

 

Prioritising myself is selfish.” I hear this way too often.

Especially from mothers, and it saddens me because we are potentially teaching our children this way of thinking.

A common belief is: prioritising ourselves = putting ourselves first = selfish.

It can be helpful to reframe this.

If “prioritising” yourself stirs up guilt, try think of it as giving yourself the love and care you deserve. Make decisions that are kinder to yourself.

Sometimes, looking at things from our children’s perspective can put things in a new light.

For example, imagine your teen has been studying into the early hours of the night (or morning) all week. So on the weekend, they want to have a sleep in, and lounge around watching movies instead of helping you with the housework. My question to you is, are they being selfish? Of course not!

Their self care is catching up on sleep and taking it easy after an exhausting week. They need to slow down and rest. And as a parent, you’d absolutely encourage them to be kind to themselves and honour what they intuitively know they need.

This is why prioritising yourself isn’t selfish.

Showing our children how WE love and care for ourselves teaches THEM to do the same for themselves.

Ultimately we want to inspire them with self loving values so they care for themselves the way we do for them now.

Do you think prioritising yourself is selfish? I’d love to hear your thoughts.

 

 

 

We often think of finding our voice as speaking up. Or speaking out. The confidence to speak our truth.

But what about finding our INNER voice. No, no, not the one that makes you doubt how wonderful you are.

I’m talking about the gentle, kind, encouraging voice that is barely a whisper. You FEEL it in unexpected daydreamy moments of driving, showering, or brushing your teeth.

And it’s so fleeting that you almost disregard the feeling as irrational optimism or wishful thinking.

Try reading the following excerpt with “voice” to mean your INNER voice.

She claimed freedom
in a voice finally found,
the strength to spread her wings,
and finally fly.”
— Leo Christopher

That inner voice is our inner guidance. Our intuition gently whispering to us, the thing we are too scared to do, or falsely believe we aren’t capable of…that we absolutely can.

PS. Journaling is a great way to tune into those gentle whispers.

When was the last time you listened to your intuition and followed the nudge?

 

 

 

Would it be easier to just leave self care off your to-do list?

Whether you have minis (kiddos) or not, feeling short of time is the most common challenge when it comes to self care. (Hint: my previous post has super simple self care ideas you can try)

So…, I don’t recommend letting go of self care. But I do suggest thinking of self care as less of a “to do”, and more as small intentional daily decisions.

Sure, some of these decisions will become actions. But not all self loving decisions require you to set aside time to do it.

Here’s some ideas to get you started!

1. Make a decision to give yourself what YOU KNOW YOU NEED:
  • more leafy greens in your meals
  • getting on top of your finances (mm hmm..)
  • dinner at the table with the family (less tv dinners)
  • booking that dentist appointment you’ve been putting off
  • 20 minutes before bed to read the book you’ve been saving for “when you have time”.
2. Make a decision to honour WHAT ISN’T RIGHT FOR YOU:
  • setting boundaries around work hours (esp if you work from home)
  • saying “no” when something isn’t right for you, even if it means disappointing someone initially
  • asking for help when you need it (life and/or biz)
  • not taking on other people’s problems and feeling like it’s your responsibility to solve them (sound familiar..?)

Everyday you have the opportunity to love yourself a little more.

Do any of the above sound like something you’d do or you swear by already?